a recount of a truly wonderful, magical day

I got on the train and slid into a seat different from where I usually sit - I know, I'm just sooooo spontaneous. The morning light shone softly through the lightly tinted windows, and I smiled. I love the sun. About a few stations in, I quickly realised that the train today was like no other Sundays - it was jam packed with people. But I didn't mind. Sitting a few seats in front of me was a small family, who was having a good chat and laughing along with each other. I thought, 'How wonderful it is to be able to see... to be able to see people laugh, to see people smile. What a gift it is'.

 When I got into the city, instead of the taking the tram, I decided to walk to work instead. I know, again, I'm just that spontaneous sometimes. Within seconds at my first set of my lights, these two lovebirds (pictured above) appeared in front of me. They were walking ever so slowly, laughing heartily and speaking in soft whispers. I adored old love, and seeing these two just made my heart flutter with all kinds of warmth, for it was just the most beautiful, endearing sight.

A few minutes later, I see an old man sitting on the steps of a shop on his pusher; he looked cold and poor. Unfortunately, I see many people like him in the city, and was about to walk past him, when I heard a voice ask, 'spare any change?' Normally I would say no, but this morning I stopped, and took the only note I had in my wallet and gave it to him... hoping that it would make him less miserable, even for a short while. He asked me about my plans for the day, we talked a little and it was good to see a little smile on his face.

I love days like this, where through little, simple snippets of happy in the worlds of others make me feel an infinte amount of gratitude, blessed to be here and part of this world.

Never quite forgotten

After getting home from a long day, I changed into my favourite skirt, slipped on a pair of sandals and out the door I went. It was nearly five, almost sunset time, and I relished in that. Oh, how the golden maple leaves crunched softly with every step I took. How the gentle sky filled with soft hues of purple, pink and orange held the promise of a calm, quiet night ahead, while a cool autumn breeze ruffled my skirt a little and made me feel weightless - as if that was a true possibility.

It made me realise how much I had missed exploring this neighbourhood o' mine. I noticed houses I never thought existed, looked up and gazed at the sky every now and then, and just really appreciate this beautiful world we live in. Where flowers bloom and leaves rustle, leaving sounds to the ears that are quite unmatched and never quite forgotten.

and then came today

This photo was the first ever instant photo I had ever taken with my new, beloved camera, the fujifilm instax 210. The same new, beloved camera which died on me this morning, approximately after less than twenty hours of unpacking it out of the cardbox in all of its fresh bubblewrap glory and taking my first photo with it. And how did it happen? While I was fixing the strap on it as precaution so that it won't drop and break in future, it plunged right to the hard hard ground. Oh guys, how my heart fell when it couldn't turn on.  And oh, the irony of it all.

This was one of those times in my life I wished I could rewind it all and magically be armed with vampire like reflexes and catch the darn thing. But of course, special powers always seem to elude me when I need it most.

Soooooo my day wasn't off to the best start. But somehow, the world answered my dampened soul with a double free at the end of the day, so I got to go home during lunchtime. Which, after running 3ks yesterday and waking up feeling like an old lady this morning, deserved an "AMEN!" with a fist pump in the air. The day was then finished off with a phone call with a good friend, whereby we spoke in a british accent (just because we can) for a good whole fifteen minutes before he called it. And fair enough, because sometimes sounding cool takes effort, guys.

So not all was lost, I guess. Those vampire like reflexes are still staying on the wishlist though.

Never let me forget

For the past week here in Malaysia, I've had moments that I wanted to freeze. Store away. Remember forever. Moments that just flew by, but I wanted to remember and experience the same feelings I felt during those specific moments. I've always had this kind of thing going on since I was a child, just snapshots of life I wanted to carry with me always. I would think to myself, I need to freeze this. This exact moment. I need to remember this.

The first time I ever did this, I was seven years old. My granddad and I were washing the car, and out of no where he swung the hose at me, on full blast, for what felt like a good twenty seconds. This was of course followed by my grandmother telling both of us off. Completely drenched, I remember thinking, I need to remember this. I wanted to remember the tickling feeling of happiness mixed in with the satisfaction that we both got told off.

And now, more than ten years later, I'm still doing it. Here are some moments that I want to keep deep within me, forever. These moments kinda give you a forever feeling that's unmatched.

▲ When we browse shoes at the women's section and my sweet nine year old cousin tries on every shoe he can get his feet on. And lemme just say, that boy can rock them wedges. I want to keep this memory forever deep within me so I can embarrass him in front of all his girlfriends with this story when he gets older, ha. Yes, I'll be that family member ;)

▲ Going to the hairdressers with my mum and gran, my two favourite ladies in the world. Also the world's least patient people in the world, and seeing them sitting completely still while they get their hair done was just gold.

▲ Making my aunt laugh so hard she had to pull over.

▲ My grandparents carrying on the usual, everyday conversation in the kitchen. Nothing special to someone else, but to me it meant the world somehow. I love them so much, and seeing them together like that makes me happy. I want to remember their love and how lucky I am to be part of this love.

▲ The fact that the sweet little cousin always says 'I want to sit with Michelle Jie Jie!' (Chinese for 'older sister'), before dinner without fail. I hope he never stops saying that.

▲ When my grandma insists on drying my hair after shower, thinking that I won't do a good enough job and get sick, the exact same concern she had ten years ago, when I was 8. It's sort of all kinds of endearing.

A weekend in five

Soooooo I'm going away to Malaysia tomorrow! Took both days of the weekend off work, and it was just so darn good in almost every sense. It was good to have to time to myself, even if it was just out running the usual errands. Is it weird to enjoy your own company? Ha, I hope not. The rest of the weekend was spent packing and taking care of last minute things. Like jumping from one shopping mall to another to get those last minute gifts for the loved ones.

I've tried to finish this post up happy, but sometimes the reality of it all does kick in, and I have to admit that the last few weeks have been unbelievably tough. I had days where I felt as though I was stepping in between cracks, and other days, those cracks just seemed like they were getting bigger, and bigger, and bigger. And while this break will not make all my worries go away, it's comforting to know that I'll be seeing the beautiful and familiar faces I love and cherish in less than twenty four hours. Gives me a warm fuzzy feeling that just won't go away.

making life feel lived

I met up with these lovely girls after work on one super cold rainy day for dinner. We had been wanting to try this new local restaurant (a famous Malaysian one!) for a long time and it honestly felt like an achievement when we all had a free night to spare. I might or might not have acted as though I knew every single meal on the menu, but to be honest, even though I did grow up in Malaysia, I never really ate out then and got to experience every single 'local' dish Malaysia had to offer. Why? Because eating out is pretty much a federal crime in my grandma's eyes "when you can eat at home". I'm sure many of you can relate! No complaints here though, she is the most amazing cook, ever.

Life for all of us has been moving so fast, and it doesn't look like it's about to slow down anytime soon. The days just pass so quickly, and before we know it, boom, we're nearly in April! Between school and working on the weekends, there really isn't much time for anything else. It was just so good to just sit down, relax and chat about anything and everything, from the everyday stuff to our most embarrassing childhood memories - something that shall neeeeeever leave that table, that I'm sure. I don't think I've laughed that hard in a long long time.

I'm so glad to be going through Year 12 with these girls. They make life feel lived.

cairns part 2

Looking back at these photos reminded me just how good life can be. And that's a precious, precious thing. One thing I love about travelling is how much you learn when you travel, that you can't really learn elsewhere. For example, on this trip, I saw koalas as their own person - if that makes sense. I normally see koalas, giraffes, zebras, and all the other animals at the zoo as a collective, you know? But in Cairns, somehow I saw them differently. One of them appeared to be sleepy, one quite outgoing and one even appeared to be smiling!

"They all have their own personality', I thought, which is really quite obvious when you think about it, but it just never crossed my mind. That last photo kills me dead every time - koalas are just so darn cute, it's hardly fair.

cairns part 1

Went on a train ride during our first morning in Cairns. The railway had such a great history well over a hundred years behind it, I quickly learned that it was one of the busiest stations during the Second World War! Being a lover of the old and quaint, I am such a sucker when it comes to history and the documented pieces of the past. Our past. There is truly something special about being on the same path as those some hundred years ago.

We were off to a great start, that's for sure.

Remind me again, why this life's good

▲ To the old, rather frail looking man who I tipped a little small change to after hearing your beautiful harmonica playing, you caught me by surprise when you stopped playing, and thanked me, then asked me where I was from. As if that wasn't enough of a surprise, when I answered 'Malaysia', you spoke fluent Malay to me and gave me a run for my money, as I haven't spoken Malay in a long, long time. Thanks for that! You made me smile.

▲ To the little sweet Korean toddler I met at the supermarket. You may know not this, but I am not Korean and I really only spoke to you what little Korean I picked up along the years. But to you, it was as though I knew every Korean word under the sun. We had quite the conversation, didn't we?

▲ To the old lady I met on the train who complimented me on my Cantonese in the midst of our conversation, thank you. I have to say it made my day, because little did I tell you that I practically learned all my Cantonese from the Hong Kong dramas I watched as a kid. It was a proud moment.

▲ To my dad who just called me to watch this tooadorableforwords video, I love that you love animals. All kinds. And that you always, always show me these videos, making my day just that much brighter.

▲ And to the old man (last picture above) I came across before work on a fine Sunday, you inspire me. Your elderly and frail age showed, but you walked with so much purpose. Slowly, yes, but steadily, sure of purpose. I was very sick that day, and you reminded me to live each day with as much purpose as you and make every day a meaningful one.

A peek at life after

I went to Melbourne University for a few days recently, and although it's not your typical camp per se, I simply had an incredible time. We had so many lovely people come talk to us, and by the end of it, many of us were just so filled with inspiration, motivation and positivity for the year to come! You know the feeling? I tried to soak in as much of it as I can, and hoped (as did many of us) that we wouldn't lose our motivation when we reached back home. I also loved staying at such a historic place, with great details like stained glass windows, fireplaces, quaint door handles - all of it very reminiscent of Hogwarts, which made me love the place even more.

One of the best things I got out of this camp was words that continued to linger in my mind for days, in which I'll never forget. "Appreciate the value of mistakes." I think we often forget how important it is to make mistakes in order to learn, and in order to grow. I know I do, and it's really time to let go of this habit of mine.